This is what life’s like
by dragonfairy16
Summary: One left his old life, one lost his life, and one lost the will to live. After 3 long years many things have change for the Junjou couples and it isn't getting any easier. How will the men deal with the life they were delt with when no one wants it?
1. The end is just the beginning

**New story YAY. Has nothing to do with my other story. New slate, new plot, new people, and best of all less complex. For those who read my other story I know I was getting too complicated and I feel like I was losing the true characters and story. So I hope you enjoy this.**

**Oh and I'm giving you all fair warning now. For those of you who are big ****Terrorist fans****, YOU WILL PROBABLY HATE THIS. There's no bashing or anything like that just…well yeah don't want to give it away. If you want to give the story a try by all means go for it. Just don't say I didn't warn you.**

**Disclaimer: New story same author. Still belongs to Shungiku Nakamura**

_It wasn't supposed to end like this…_

The red sports car skidded to a halt in front of the air terminal. The author jumped out of the car into the cold cloudy weather and slammed the door shut. The guard by the door yelled to him.

"Wait sir you're not supposed to park here!"

_It wasn't supposed to end at all…_

"Get out of my way." Usagi yelled running passed the security guard into the busy air terminal. He stopped short and looked at the board for the right flight gate.

_There were never meant to fight. Not like this…_

He found the flight to America, the one going to Hawaii. Gate 92, that was all the way down on the other side of the airport. Akihiko loosened his tie and began the long sprint to the gate.

_If Misaki didn't move out and then take that study abroad program…_

As he ran he could hear the load speaker.

"Last call for flight 297 to Hawaii. Departure will be in a few minutes." Usagi's eyes widen at the call and tried to run faster.

_He shouldn't have done what he had done…_

86, 87, 88, 89, 90, 91…he came to a sudden stop as he saw Takahiro and his now pregnant wife Manami walking towards him. Takahiro looked up at his panting friend sadly.

"Akihiko?" His friend said cocking his eye brow.

_Then they could have…_

"Is he…is he…"

"Is he gone? Hai the plane just pulled out." Usagi ran to the large glass window and saw the huge plan taxi down the runway and begin to lift of the ground.

"I'm sorry Akihiko. We tried to change his mind but he really wanted to go." Misaki's older brother said placing his hand on his friends shoulder. Usagi put his hands on the cold window pane. The cold air that clung to the window did nothing to stop the sweat that trickled down the man's brow. There was nothing he could do now but wait. Wait until the younger boy could forgive him. Wait until he came back; wait until he took him back. But that would be a very long wait.

_They could have still been together…_

**OK so how do you like my new Junjou Romantica story? I know this is short but I promise the rest will be much, much longer. I just wanted to get it out before I forgot. Finally making a new story all together and I hope you all still like. **

**Review kindly Onegai. **


	2. not what I saw coming

**So this chapter is all angsty but I promise it will get better as it goes on. I love the Junjou humor so there will defiantly be some. Just not in this one. So enjoy**

**Disclaimer: Shungiku Nakamura's**

THREE YEARS LATER:

~Tokyo air terminal~

Snow fluttered to the ground as the automatic doors opened with a swish. A pair of long legs in forest green jeans and black boots walked out trailing a wheeled suitcase behind him. He stuffed his black gloves into his black jacket puffing his breath into the cold air.

"Misaki over here." Takahiro called out running towards his younger brother. Misaki looked up his green eyes shining.

"Onii-chan, Manami-chan…Konichiwa." Misaki answered back as he saw his brother, and sister-in-law who was holding his 3 year old niece Sayuri. Takahiro wrapped his brother into a hug.

"It's been so long."

"Hai, hai but I still need to breath."

"Oh gomen." His older brother said pulling away from Misaki.

"Misaki how are you." Manami said give the boy a kiss on the head. "You got that growth spurt you always wanted." She laughed.

"Yeah, a couple of inches. Is this Sayuri."

"Yep. Say hi to your Uncle Misaki."

"Konichiwa." The girl giggled before shyly placing her face into her mother's shoulder. The three of the adults laughed at the small girl.

"Well come on let's get you to your apartment." Takahiro helped Misaki get the rest of his things into the car and they drove off.

"So how is Hawaii?" Manami asked.

"Amazing. I got plenty of pictures for you to see. But I do have to say I missed the snow." Misaki laughed looking out the window.

"Did you miss anything else while you where away." Takahiro asked slyly. Misaki knew exactly what he was talking about. The man that made Misaki leave for the tropical islands to finish his school experience.

"That's not funny Onii-chan. Of course I missed him. I missed everyone. And now that I'm here I'm going to miss Kaito."

"Oh Kaito-san you have pictures of him right?" Manami asked happily

"Hai of course I do." Misaki took out his cell phone and handed it to Manami. Takahiro leaned over to see the photo as well. It was a picture of Misaki sitting on a hammock with the ocean behind him. Sitting next to him was a man a little taller than him. He had light brown hair that went down to his shoulder and sharp violate eyes. The man's arms were around Misaki's waist and Misaki held his hand up in a piece sign and laughing.

"Oh he's so kawaii." Misaki's sister-in-law cooed.

"So you really moved on huh Misaki." Takahiro said a hint of disappointment in his voice.

"Onii-san don't start this again. It was bad enough over the phone I don't need it in person."

"I know but he is my best friend and he really has been miserable these past three years."

"Yeah well your making me miserable right now." Misaki said pouting into his seat.

"Dear you should drop it for now. Misaki has a new boyfriend and you said you would be happy for him." Takahiro's wife said. Takahiro sighed.

"Yes dear."

~On the other side of Tokyo; Hiro's and Nowaki's apartment~

Hiro shut the door with a big bag of groceries. He placed it on the table and began peeling off his gloves, hat, scarf and jacket. He finished putting away all the food and placed the tea kettle on the stove. When the tea was finished he shuffled his way over to Nowaki's bedroom and knocked on the door.

"Nowaki can I come in?" He asked quietly before opening the door slightly. The room was dark, the curtains closed, and a huge lump was hidden under the covers.

"Nowaki I brought you some tea." Hiro didn't get a response. "Nowaki please you haven't eaten all day. And you didn't eat anything yesterday either." The only response Hiro got that time was a little shuffle under the covers.

"Nowaki please it's been a year already you have to stop doing this." He began moving towards the bed. He stopped when he heard mumbling under the covers.

"What…I didn't hear you."

"I said please go away." The man under the blanket muffled. Hiro looked down at the tea in his hands and placed it on the counter next to the untouched turkey sandwich from that afternoon.

"I'm leaving the tea next to the sandwich. I'll see you in the morning." And with that he left the room and shut the door.

Now in the hallway Hiro pushed up against the door and slide down wrapping his arms around his knees. He looked up at the wall across from him where framed diplomas of his and Nowaki's hard work and pictures of them and their friends and family hung. White roses in a vase on the hall table had wilted and petals fell to the floor. Hiro got up and collected the fallen flowers and dumped them in the garbage pail. He opened the fridge and grabbed a bottle of beer. He opened it and plopped himself on the couch and turned on the TV. He didn't know what to do anymore. He wanted this all to be over. But he knew that it was anything but.

~Tokyo Cemetery~

A hearse pulled out of the black steel gates splashing mud on the man standing in front of the graveyard. He continued standing there like it never happened, the big black umbrella shielding him from the fallen snow. He sighed and blew a puff of air out and watched it dissipate into the air. He turned and walked into the cemetery and passed some other mourners who just had to bury their loved ones. That's what he had to do last year. Bury a love one.

It wasn't fair but it was life. He told himself that everyday just so he could get up in the morning. He turned past the now hibernating Sakura tree. In the spring its pink petals floated over the graves. But now it was just another reminder that all things die. He walked over to the grave he was looking for and stood in front of it. He reached into his pocket and pulled something out. Bending down he placed the object in front of the grave and stood back up. He placed his hand on the top of the stone and then walked away. An elderly man and woman passed him and the three of them bowed their heads as they past each other. When the couple passed him and the grave they cocked their eyes at what he left. In front of the grave was a big green cabbage. They looked closer at the engraving; the woman shook her head and then moved on. For they didn't know the person, and to them he wasn't anyone important. But to the man who left him the cabbage he was the world. And now he was gone.

~Takatsuki Shinobu~

1990-2008

To live in the hearts of others is not to die

Loving son, brother, grandson, friend, and lover

**And that ladies and gentlemen is why you will hate me if your favorite couple is the Junjou Terrorist. No that will not be the last time you hear about them, yes he really is dead and no I will not leave you hanging and you will eventually find out what happened. Hope you like so far.**

**Review kindly Onegai **


	3. Reunions

**I'm just going to dive right into so enjoy 8D**

**Disclaimer: Shungiku Nakamura**

Misaki pulled his bicycle into the bike parking lot of M university. He looked it up at the familiar building. He smiled and breathed in deep and then sneezed. Rubbing his finger under his nose he sniffled.

"I wonder if I'll ever get use to winter again." Misaki complained and shifted his bag further on his shoulder walking up to the tan building…The building that started it all, the reason why he met Usagi all those years ago, where he met Sumi-sempai, and it's the building that got him into its sister school in Hawaii where he met Kaito.

After entering the building he went into the office that dealt with transfer students. He handed the secretary his papers so he could come back to the main school.

"It says here you changed your major." The young secretary said.

"Hai I changed my major from economics to ancient Japanese literature." The woman nodded and typed into the computer.

"Ok you're going to have to speak to the head of the Lit department, Miyagi-sensei. But you're going to have to walk around the building. They haven't finished repairing the Economic wing." Misaki cocked his eyebrow but didn't say anything about it.

"Hai arigatou." Misaki bowed and went on his way. As he got closer to the Lit department he could hear the sounds of construction. He turned the corner and saw the rest of the hall being cemented and painted. Wood beams were being placed everywhere and men were busy hauling heavy machinery. Misaki went to the door leading to the outside when he spotted the memorial. A bunch of flowers was set in front of the construction site. Candles and cards where spread among pictures of young men and women.

"Wow. I wonder what happened here." Misaki said to himself out loud. After the detour he finally reached Miyagi's office. He knocked on the door and stood back as it was opened from the other side. Misaki's eyes widen and then bowed slightly.

"Kamijō-sensei, konichiwa."

"Konichiwa. Can I help you?" Hiro said uninterested.

"Hai I'm looking for Miyagi-sensei."

"He's not in right now." The professor said annoyingly. "That idiot is never in. Can I do something for you?" A sweat drop fell from Misaki's face as he felt the waves of frustration fall from his old lit teacher.

"Well you probably don't remember me. I use to take your course and then I did a study abroad program to Hawaii."

"And…"

"And well…I switched my major to ancient lit and I need Miyagi-sensei to sign off on it."

"I can do that if you want." Hiro held his hand out to take the forms and the two men entered the office.

Misaki looked around the messy office.

"Ano…sensei can I ask you a question."

"What is it?" Hiro said looking through Misaki's papers.

"What happened to the Economic wing?" Hiro's eyes widen.

"There was an accident that's all." Hiro said sternly not looking up at the papers. Misaki looked at him in confusion but he didn't press it. Misaki heard the teacher sign the papers and walked up to the desk.

"Here everything seems to be in order. Just hand this back to the transfer office and you'll be set to start class for the next semester next week." Hiro handed the student back his papers.

"Arigatou sensei, ja ne." Misaki left and closed the door behind him. Hiro grabbed a book marked with post it's and blue streaks on the pages. Grabbing the blue highlighter he began reading through the book. Water dripped onto the pages smearing the words as Hiro tried sniffing back the tears. He slammed the book shut and threw it across the room hitting some books of the other desk.

"Accident my ass." He mumbled before resting his head upon his desk and cryed.

~Transfer office~

Misaki just walked out of the office and was looking over his schedule when he heard someone call his name.

"Misaki!" Misaki turned around. His smile widen when he saw who it was.

"Sumi-Sempai!" Misaki waved as the man got closer.

"I haven't seen you in ages. How are you?" Sumi asked.

"I'm fine. But what are you still doing here?"

"I'm getting paid to substitute for one of the economic teachers. She's having a baby."

"Sugoi. That must be so much fun."

"Hai. It's very refreshing from my usual job. Would you care to join me for lunch?" Misaki looked at his watch.

"I have time before I have to go to work. I would love to."

~University dining hall~

"So you really got yourself a new boyfriend." Sumi said leaning on his arm watching Misaki slurp up his ramen. Misaki nodded with his mouth full.

"No more Usami-sensei." Misaki swallowed and looked down smiling lightly.

"No…no more Usami-sensei." They sat there in silence for a few moments.

"So tell me what happened to the Economic wing. I asked one of the sensei's but he wouldn't tell me." Sumi frowned.

"There was an accident with a drunk driver. Supposedly he swerved into the wrong lane into a large delivery truck. Unfortunately the driver drove off the street to get out of the way and lost control of the truck. It went into the school and killed a lot of students and teachers."

"Oh. Gomen I didn't know." Misaki said tears threatening to fall. Sumi leaned over and wiped the tear from his face.

"You're so sweet Misaki, don't cry. It happened a year ago and there was nothing anyone could do about it."

"And the hall still isn't finished."

"Yes well the dean of the school didn't want to deal with it right away. His son Shinobu Takatsuki was killed in the accident. Almost made it to but…"Misaki looked down.

"What happened to the drivers?"

"Well the truck driver miraculously lived. Although I assume he's doing a whole lot of therapy. And the drunk driver was caught and sentence to life in prison. Serves him right, this was his 5th time drunk driving." Sumi's cell phone went off and picked it up.

"Moshi moshi…hai…hai…really ok I'll be there in a few." He put his phone down and stood up. Misaki stood up with him.

"Gomen but I have to go to a meeting. Promise to keep in touch now that your back."

"Hai of course." The two men hugged and went their separate ways. Misaki was about to walk out of the building when he stopped short and doubled back. He bought a bottle of root beer and walked back out. He traveled to the Economics wing and over to the memorial. He looked over all the photos with their names on them.

Kudo Hitomi

Chiba Hikaru

Kimura Kazuki

Ito Nori

And many other names. Over thirteen people. And then he spotted the dean sons picture. Shinobu Takatsuki Picture was surrounded by pictures and candles. He was laughing in his picture his blue eyes shining. Misaki might not have ever met him but he felt so bad that someone so young could be killed. All of the people who died didn't deserve it.

He just kept thinking that if he never left he could have been killed as well. He would still be an economic major and he could have been in that hall. He placed the root beer can in front of the memorial. (1) He closed his eyes, clapped his hands together twice, and bowed. He stood back up and turned looking down at his watch. When he looked back up he froze in his spot. Standing before him was the one man he never thought he would see again. The man held flowers in his hands his violate eyes wide and in shock.

"Misaki." The man gasped. Misaki swallowed hard and put up a determined face.

"Konichiwa Usami-san."

**I know the root beers weird but when I went to Japan I visited a shrine and some of the graves had drinks like root beer on the stone and I guessed it was there for a memorial like flowers.**

**Dun, dun, dun. Usagi and Misaki finally meet again. Will there love bloom once again or have they moved on for real. Well you're going to have to read to find out. I know I'm evil. **

**Review Kindly Onegai **


	4. second chance

**Sorry for taking so long but college has started once again which means studying, classes, studying, work, studying and did I mentioned studying.**

**So let me just catch you up. Shinobu's dead Nowaki's depressed and Misaki has just seen Usagi for the first time in 3 years, awkward much. And can get more story get any more depressing…yes, yes it can (evil laughter) hope you still enjoy.**

**Disclaimer: Shungiku Nakamura but if you squint I got some of my own plot line in there.**

*1 year ago*

Usagi knocked on the door and entered Hiro's office. His eyes widen as he saw a young student making out with the professor that worked with Hiro. He frowned as the feelings of Misaki raised from the bottom of his heart. The two of them pulled apart.

"Gomen." The older man said rubbing the back of his neck. The other man was blushing madly. "Can I help you with something?"

"I was looking for Hiroki. Is he here?"

"He went to go meet his boyfriend for lunch. They should be finishing up and coming back pretty soon."

Usagi stared at the professor and then at the boy. Usagi thanked the man and turned to leave.

"Wait I have to leave…I'll walk you out." The boy shouted grabbing his school bag and lifting it on his shoulder. Usagi walked into the hall and the boy followed without saying good bye to the literature teacher.

I'm Takatsuki Shinobu by the way." Shinobu said smiling up at the older man.

"Usami…Usami Akihiko."

"You mean the author."

"Hai."

"Miyagi talks about you all the time." Usagi raised an eyebrow and smiled.

"You mean your lover." Shinobu blushed wildly. "You're lucky… Having a lover is a great part of life." Shinobu frowned at the obviously sad man.

"Gomen…I didn't mean to bring up painful memories." Usagi's eyes widen.

"No no it's fine. We broke up but it's been two years already." Shinobu stopped walking.

"But you seem so upset. You really must still love him. Maybe you should you try and get him back." Usagi stopped walking and turned around. The kid was looking up at him his fists balled up in determination. His eyes widen in realization and then bowed.

"Sorry I was out of place." Usagi smiled slightly.

"No it's fine and your right. I shouldn't have given up on him so early. But it's too late now. I would need to have a really good reason to see him again, to have a second chance." Usagi looked out the window. A car blared his horn as another driver cut him off. Some people can be such bad drivers.

The two walked through the economic wing and Usagi spotted Hiroki and his boyfriend standing at the other end. Usagi smiled at the sight of Hiro holding a load of books and his boyfriend with a stack of papers that he could barely see beyond. Hiro was what looked like complaining to the giant of a man as his boyfriend just nodded and smiled brightly. He was always smiling, no matter what Hiro said. No matter what cruel words the professor sputtered at the younger man. Usagi frowned and shook his head trying to get an awful memory out of his head. He and the boy walked out of the economic hall and into the lobby the two other men were standing in.

"Akihiko what are you doing here?" Hiro asked.

"I wanted to know if I can borrow another book. But I can see you're busy." He said seeing the collection they were holding.

"Hai…But I think I can fill you in to just get one book." Hiro then saw the younger boy next to his long time friend.

"What you moved on from the pervert of a professor to a pervert of an author." Shinobu scowled.

"Excuse me but I was just leaving and he was going my way. And the only pervert I see here is you." Hiro's eye twitched and Nowaki laughed shakily.

"Hiro calm down he's just a kid." Just as Nowaki said that wind blew through the corridor, Nowaki tried to stop his papers from being blown away but was not quick enough to catch many of the important documents.

"Oh no come back!" He yelled collecting some of the papers around him. Hiro scowling bent down to collect the papers in the lobby and so did Usagi. Shinobu turned and saw some of the papers had blown back into the economic wing.

"I'll go get the papers that flew away!" Shinobu yelled running down the hall.

"Arigatou!" Nowaki yelled out. Shinobu ran passed some other students. Some of the students who knew Shinobu stopped and helped. Like Kudo Hitomi and Ito Nori. As Nowaki stood up he looked towards the open window where the wind blew from. His eyes widen in horror as he saw the huge 8 wheeler truck cut through the campus lawn and straight for the building. He dropped the papers he just collected causing the other two men to look up and yelled.

"Move!" He shouted towards the passing students and teachers ahead of him. Shinobu looked up at the men smiling…Until he noticed there gaze and looked out the window next to him and saw the oncoming vehicle. His mouth dropped and he froze on the spot. Shinobu watched as the truck came closer and closer. His friend Hitomi yelled as she covered her face with her arms and then…

*Present day*

Usagi bought was he was told to be Shinobu's favorite flowers. He rounded the corner through the lobby and stopped at the edge of the economic wing. A young man was bent over in prayer. Probably one of the victim's friends. The man stood up and Usagi froze. The hair was longer and a bit darker but…

The man turned around looking down at his watch but when he looked up the author was clearly able to see those crystal green eyes. The eyes that always brought joy to him. The eyes that gave him inspiration and desire the ones that made him feel alive all those years ago and made him feel more alive than he had in these past three years.

"Misaki." The man gasped. Misaki swallowed hard and put up a determined face.

"Konichiwa Usami-san."

That name. It didn't fit right coming out of the now deeper sounding student's mouth. But it was still him. He didn't know what to do. Misaki walked up to him. Usagi tried not to smile when he noticed Misaki trying to look confident but was sweating under his winter coat.

"What are you doing here?" Misaki asked.

"I should ask you the same thing."

"I moved back to finish my grad courses." Misaki eyed the flowers. Usagi noticed and lifted them up.

"For a friend who died in the accident." Misaki frowned.

"Sorry for your lost." Usagi nodded and the two stood there in an uncomfortable silence. Usagi then walked passed Misaki and placed the flowers on the memorial and bowed. He stood up and turned around to see his ex-lover walking away. Freaking out silently (1) he quickly walked beside Misaki.

"Wait can take you out to some coffee or tea."

"Iie." Misaki stated while walking briskly his eyes closed trying to pretend the author wasn't there.

"I have work and I would love it if you didn't know where I was working." Misaki saying the last part harsher than then the rest of the sentence. Usagi flinched.

"OK I deserved that. And I won't follow you to where ever you work…But at least let me buy you coffee after that." Misaki stopped walking.

"I've moved on."

"I know that."

"I have another boyfriend."

"I've been told."

"I don't want to be angry with you anymore." Usagi turned Misaki around and put his hands on the younger man's shoulders.

"Me neither." Misaki sighed.

"I get out at 8. I can meet you at the Hotoki restaurant we used the go to after that ok." Usagi nodded.

"But only to talk."

"Promise." Usagi smiled. Misaki looked at the older man suspiciously and walked out of the building. Usagi looked around in total surprise that it was so easy to get Misaki to at least stand him again. He walked back over to the memorial and looked down at Shinobu's picture.

"Looks like you opened up my second chance kid…Thanks." He bow again and then walked away higher than he ever felt before.

**I know freaking out silently is hard to imagine but it's pretty much when you look totally fine on the outside but your stomach is doing somersaults and I thought that was a cool way to put it lol.**

**So you guys still have to wait to see why Misaki and Usagi broke up but I've been putting little hints into the story so see if you can pick up on them. The same goes for Nowaki's depression. But at least you got to see part of the accident right…right…'0_0;**

**So as always review kindly Onegai **


	5. The beginning of the end

**OK so I got this one out pretty fast. YAY ME. And this chapter will explain the Romantica's story. **

**Disclaimer: Shungiku Nakamura. And if there was ever a one in a million chance that she ever reads this I hope she don't hate it.**

Forcing the door open against the strong winter winds Misaki walked into the restaurant breathing into his hands warming them up. He looked around and spotted Usagi in the corner of the room already sipping on a cup of tea. Misaki breathed in deeply and then trudged his way over to the older man. When Usagi saw the younger boy he stood up and smiled.

"I didn't think you would show."

"Yeah sorry about that. Work ended later than usual and the snow slowed everything down." Usagi helped Misaki take of his jacket and they both sat down. The waiter came over and Misaki asked for a green tea and a piece of chocolate cake.

"Same as always." Usagi said placing his head in his hand.

"Well this is where they make the best chocolate cake." Misaki answered back smiling. The waiter came back with the order and left the two men to their meal. Misaki took a bite and smiled.

"Oishii!" Misaki said happily the spoon still in his mouth and a chocolate crumb hanging off the side of his mouth.

"Just as I remember it." Misaki looked at Usagi who was just sitting there and smiling at the boy. "Would you like a bite?" The boy asked.

"Of course." As Misaki scooped another piece of cake for Usagi the author reached over surprising the other man as he pulled the crumb off his face and placing it in his own mouth. Misaki sat there his mouth hanging opened.

"You're right, it is good."

"What are you doing?!" Misaki hissed coming back to his senses.

"You said I can have a piece." The spoon clunked to the plate and Misaki rubbed his head.

"Usami-sensei…"

"Akihiko."

"Nani?"

"If you can't call me Usagi you can at least call me by my first name." Misaki sighed.

"Akihiko…you can't do that now."

"I know, I know but….it's just that can't we give it another try."

"No. I have a boyfriend."

"I don't even remember why this began."

"You punched my customer because you thought he was hitting on me and got me fired from the restaurant." Misaki said in a monotone voice glaring at the author. "Memory refreshed?" Usagi frowned slightly.

"Oh yeah…I forgot about that."

*Flashback*

Misaki walked over to one of his tables a white apron adorned his waist a pencil stuck in his ear. A fat, ugly, black haired man smiled as Misaki came over.

"Konichiwa are you ready to order." Misaki asked sweetly. Just as he was writing down the meal Usagi walked in to visit Misaki on his hour break. He did it every time Misaki work. Sometimes he would bring food from home or Misaki's text books so he could help in study. Misaki turned around and waved a small hi to Usagi while blushing madly. What Misaki didn't see but Usagi can see as plain as day was the customer had purposely dropped his fork. He then tapped Misaki on the back.

Usagi walked over a look of concern written on his face as Misaki turned around and saw the fork. As Misaki bent down to pick up the fork the man eyed Misaki's…or how Usagi saw it his properties ass. The perverted man then began to reach toward the college student. Usagi growled and stormed up to the table. Misaki stood up.

"Usagi what are you…" The author passed him pulled the pervert up by the cuff of the neck and punched him square in the face.

"Usagi!" Misaki screamed. A woman next to that table screamed and the customer fell to the ground. Misaki's boss stormed out of the kitchen. After about an hour of apologies and discounts to the customers so they wouldn't sue Misaki was still fired and the teen stormed out and a just as pissed off Usagi following him.

The next day after a night of silence stares and sleeping in separate rooms for the first time in a year Misaki was about to leave the apartment with a newspaper page in his hand.

"Misaki where are you going?" Usagi asked as he walked down the stairs.

"I'm looking for another job. What else." The teen said.

"Where?"

"This restaurant on the other side of the city."

"No." Usagi said simply. Misaki turned around.

"What do you mean no?"

"You can't work at restaurants anymore." Misaki's eyebrow twitched and a vein popped from his head.

"Excuse me but I don't think you can tell me where I can and can't work." Once again the two lovers were locked in a staring eye contest. "Sheesh…" Misaki cried out. "So what you don't trust me."

"No I don't." Misaki's eyes widen.

"What?" Misaki whispered.

"I said I don't trust you. You flaunted yourself at that guy and you didn't even know!"

"I…I can't believe you just said that." Misaki turned around and walked out of the apartment tears threatening to pour from his eyes. Usagi stood there in the middle of the hall.

"That came out wrong." But Misaki didn't come back that night for Usagi to apologize and to take back what he said.

Nor the next night

Nor the next. Misaki's friends from school came by and picked up Misaki's belongings. After almost a month Usagi finally heard the news. Misaki was leaving…for good.

*End Flash Back*

"But why Hawaii."

"Because when I moved into my own apartment you kept sending me teddy bears and manga."

"But I thought you liked getting those."

"Not when I get 10 of each every day." The two sat there in silence for a few minutes looking every which way but at each other. Ringing came from Misaki's pocket and he pulled out a cell phone. His eyes widen slightly and he smiled.

"Gomen I have to take this." Misaki turned slightly and opened the red phone. "Konichiwa Kaito." At the mention of Misaki's lover Usagi tried to move in closer to here the conversation. Misaki feeling the older man staring at him tired to move over further.

"Can I call you back later…When I'm at my apartment…hai…love you too…ja ne." At the words I love you Usagi's eyes widen and he pulled back."

"Gomen I need to start heading back." Misaki took out some money and laid it on the table before getting up.

"Iie I'll pay." Misaki smiled as he put his jacket on and slipped on his gloves.

"You're the same as always too. It's fine…And maybe we can see each other again someday." Misaki took out a card and handed it to his ex-lover. "Here's my number." Usagi took the card quietly and read card. Misaki turned to leave.

"Misaki…" Usagi said quietly. Misaki stood in his place but did not turn around.

"Was there anything I could have done that would have made you stayed?" Misaki stood there in silence for a few seconds Usagi trying to read the boy from the back of the head. Misaki's now gloved hands clenched tightly, his head bent downward in thought.

"I don't know." Misaki finally whispered, and walked out leaving Usagi to himself.

**Two flashbacks down one more to go. Soon ever you will know Nowaki and Hiro's story YAY lol. I hope these flash backs aren't annoying anyone. **

**Review kindly Onegai **


	6. Hope still there

**Gomen, Gomen I take way to long I know. (Bash self on head) But here's another chapter.**

**Disclaimer: Shungiku Nakamura**

Nowaki sat in the waiting room. Soft music played from the speakers on the walls and magazines were spread out on the table in front of him but he could hear nor see any of it. He was in his own little world. He stared out at the wall in front of him a painting of a mother duck with baby ducks following her across a deserted road staring back.

"Kusama Nowaki." A woman called for the tall man. Nowaki glanced at her and then stood up. He walked into the woman's office and sat on the comfy arm chair that he has gotten so use to sitting on since the accident. The woman who called him in pulled a pencil from her black hair that was held up into a loose bun with a dark blue clip. She flattened her equally dark blue skirt and suit as she took a seat across from him.

"Konichiwa Watanabe-sensei." Nowaki said as he shifted himself into a comfortable position. No matter how comfortable the chairs are he was just always too big for them.

"Konichiwa Nowaki-san. How has your week been?"

"Fine."

"And how is Hiroki?" Nowaki took a moment to think.

"He's fine."

"Are you sure. That last time you said he was fine you didn't even know that his father passed away and I had to hear about that from him." Nowaki thought for a second. She was right; he used to be completely fixated on everything Hiro-san did and now he didn't even bother to try and see if Hiro-san had a good day or left for work in the morning.

"He seemed fine when I left." The doctor the usual doctor 'umhm' and wrote something down on her clip board she held in her lap.

"Now why don't we start off at where we left at last time? You were telling me how it was when you first started working at the hospital." Nowaki breathed in deep.

"It was confusing I guess. But the little kids in my department were so nice and tried to help me. They all wanted to show me there favorite toy and favorite games."

"But they were all terminally ill correct? You knew they weren't going to live for too long."

"Hai."

"But you thought that Shinobu had a chance didn't you." Nowaki looked down his bangs covering his eyes.

"Hai." He whispered. The doctor once again wrote something down and crossed her legs.

"It's been a year Nowaki. Maybe it's time for you to tell me what happened."

"You know what happened." Nowaki said harshly gripping the arms of the chair.

"Hai hai I've read the reports, heard from the people who were there with you. Hiroki and Akihiko have been able to talk about it but I still need to hear it from you. You are the patient remember." She said. To anyone else she seemed like a very sweet and caring person but right now Nowaki thought she was just a prying bitch.

"Try Nowaki, you don't need to get into details just what you saw. Close your eyes and just tell me some of it. If it gets too difficult we can stop." Nowaki sighed and gave in. He closed his eyes and breathed in deeply.

"I was at the University with Hiro-san helping him bring his papers and books to his office…"

*Flashback*

"And then another kid's phone went off right in the middle of my lecture on the 'Tale of Genji'. I just don't understand how they can't live with their cell phones for an hour." Hiro spit out.

"Hai hai." Nowaki said smiling sweat shimmering down his face from all the papers and books he was holding.

"Let me grab some of that." Hiro said stopping Nowaki and taking some of the books so all Nowaki had were papers. Hiro looked over and saw Shinobu and Usagi walking towards them.

Akihiko what are you doing here?" Hiro asked. When they finally reached the couple Usagi smiled.

"I wanted to know if I can borrow another book. But I can see you're busy."

"Hai…But I think I can fill you in to just get one book." Hiro began to argue with the boy next to Usagi and laughed after the pervert comment Shinobu made.

"Hiro calm down he's just a kid." Nowaki said knowing how shaken his boyfriend could get. Suddenly he felt the papers begin to lift from the pile by a little gust of wind from an opened window and then go flying as the wind grew stronger.

"Oh no come back!" He yelled. The men all scrambled around for Hiro's important papers. He heard behind him the kid call out that he was going to grab the papers that flew down the hall.

"Arigatou!" Nowaki yelled looking up to the retreating boy. As Nowaki stood up he went to see what window was open so he could close it. That's when he saw it, the huge truck plowing through the courtyard. He looked down the hall where it was headed.

"Move!" He shouted everyone. The kid who volunteered to grab the rest of the papers looked up at him with a smile. How vividly he could remember that smile before that kid looked out the windows in terror.

The Truck smashed into the wall with a death defying sound. A girl screamed as he watched in horror as the truck hit the other side of the hall into a class room that was in session. The rest of the trucks body turned sideways and took up the rest of the hall. Nowaki dropped all the papers he had collected and ran towards the truck.

"Nowaki!" He heard his boyfriend yell out to him.

"Call 119 Hiro-san!" (1)Nowaki screamed back. And saw that Akihiko already had his cell phone out. With the adrenaline kicking in he began to remove the rubble. He grabbed a hold of the first hand he saw.

"Hold on I'll get you out." He removed more of the rubble. It was the kid who helped him with the papers.

"I got you." He pulled the boy out.

"Are you alright?" He asked checking him over. He had scrapes and was bleeding pretty badly from his arm but he was breathing.

"I… I think so." The kid stumbled.

"Are you sure?" The kid looked up at Nowaki in a daze but nodded slowly.

"My side hurts a little bit but other than that." The blond haired student held onto his side.

"It's probably some bruising. You'll be fine. Get yourself to safety. Shinobu nodded again.

"Arigatou" And Nowaki nodded back and began to search for more people who could have lived. He heard the sirens of the ambulance and police. The next arm he found belonged to a girl. He checked her pulse and found that she had already passed on. He frowned and moved on. This continued for about an hour with the help of firefighters and rescues works.

Nowaki stood back to get a small break. Hiro came up to him with a plastic cup of water.

"Are you ok?" Hiro asked.

"Hai." Nowaki answered back with a smile. He looked around and saw news reporters and onlookers. His eyes then came upon the first person who he found, the kid who grabbed the papers. He looked at the boy in confusion. He was just standing there staring out into space. Giving Hiro the cup he began to walk over to Shinobu. The teen looked back at him with a scared frown. To Nowaki's horror blood began to drips from his lips and then he fell to the ground.

"Shinobu!" Nowaki remembered as Miyagi ran through the crowed and grabbed the boy.

"Shinobu wake up…Shinobu!" Nowaki stood there in shock. One of the EMT's ran pass him to the teen on the floor. The older man still clung onto him on the floor tears streaming down his eyes. This wasn't possible. He was just fine two seconds ago. He should be fine.

"Nowaki…Nowaki!" He could Hear Hiro shout trying to shake him from his stance. But he couldn't move. Couldn't speak.

"Nowaki…Nowaki!"

*End Flashback*

"Nowaki…" He could hear the therapist call out quietly. He opened his eyes and tasted his salty tears upon his lips. He wiped his cheeks and looked back at the doctor.

"Nowaki you know that none of this was your fault. Anyone could have missed that he had internal bleeding in that hectic situation."

"But it was my fault!" Nowaki shouted. It was my fault the papers flew away; it was my fault he was in the hall. I told him that he was going to be alright even though he was in pain. He was scared and he believed me. And then he ended up dying because I told him he would be fine. No one checked him like they should have."

"So you control the wind?" Nowaki looked at the woman in confusion.

"Iie?"

"Did you cause the truck to go into the building?"

"Iie."

"Did you cause the internal bleeding?"

"Iie." Nowaki said looking down.

"I know you feel bad but if you were there or not the same thing could have happened." The two of them stared at each other in silence. Finally the doctor looked at her watch.

"Our time is up for now. Now when you get back home Nowaki I want you to go home and just say Tadaimato Hiroki. You don't need to talk about anything just let him know that you're still there. Do you think you can do that?" Nowaki looked around for a second.

"I guess." He said skeptically.

"Great. I think we made some real progress today. I'll see you next week."

"Hai." The two of them stood up and walked out of the office.

"Yamato Tohru." The doctor called out. Nowaki saw a young woman grabbing her purse and walk pass Nowaki quickly.

"I did it Watanabe-sensei. I told my husband I trust him and he was so happy."

"That's great Tohru." Watanabe-sensei said closing the door behind the two of them. Maybe she's right. Maybe he should take her advice.

~Hiro's and Nowaki's apartment~

Nowaki hesitantly put the key in the door. He turned it and it clicked opened with ease. He entered the apartment and took off his shoes. He took a deep breath and walked into the den. He found his lover stretched out on the couch with an opened book on his chest and sleeping soundly. His mouth hung opened and light snores erupted from his lips after every couple of breaths. Then Nowaki did something he hadn't done in a long time, he smiled.

It was faint. If someone wasn't looking carefully they probably would have missed it. It wasn't one of his big smiles that he used to do but it was still a smile. He took the book from Hiro grabbed a blanket from one of the chairs and draped it over him. Going to the fridge he opened it and found a tin foiled covered plate with his name on it. He grabbed it and placed it on the table and unwrapped it finding a sandwich with all of his favorite foods on it. Taking the sandwich he dug in and ate the whole thing.

A couple of hours later Hiro woke up and found himself snuggled in a blanket the book he was reading on the coffee table. Confused he looked at the time and decided to eat dinner. He walked over to the fridge and opened the door only to stop in shock. The plate with Nowaki's food had disappeared and in its place was a note. He pulled it out and read the sloppy hand writing only a doctor has.

'Tadaima' was the entire note. Hiro pulled his hand to his mouth as tears welled up in his eyes.

There might be hope yet.

**(1) 119 is the same as our 911**

**I apologize if I messed up how a physiologist works. I never have been so I just wrote from what I assumed and from TV shows.**


	7. Can't move on

**I apologize for taking so long. College is not the best time to write. Just a lot of work, but now that finals are ending I have some time to squeeze in a few things.**

_**Italics**_** is people talking in English**

**Disclaimer: Don't own Junjou Romantica**

Miyagi sat down on the park bench waiting for the woman he was to meet. Risako had asked him to meet her and he couldn't ignore the offer of his ex-wife and older sister of his lov…well he couldn't ignore her. He sat there watching his breath puff from his mouth. But it was warming up enough that he didn't need such a heavy jacket anymore.

"Miyagi." He heard his name from behind him. He stood up and gave the woman a hug. She pulled back pushing her bob cut hair behind her ear, the diamond ring that adorned her hand shinning in the sunlight. Miyagi smiled lightly at the protruding bump coming from Risako's stomach that would soon become what Risako said would like to make his god child.

"How is Kota?" Miyagi asked. Kota was Risako's new husband who he was so happy she met.

"He's fine. He's at work so he couldn't join us, but he's coming to pick me up afterwards." Miyagi offered her his arm and she took it wrapping her arm around his and they began to walk through the park.

"So what did you need to talk about?" Miyagi asked smiling to his ex-wife.

"Father allowed me to clean out Shinobu's room and to turn it into the baby's nursery." Miyagi stopped walking and stood there in shock. Risako walked in front of him placing her fingers on the bridge of her nose and rubbed it up and down.

"Miyagi don't say anything, it's time to move on. I haven't come here for your approval considering I'm still not sure how I felt about you having a relationship with a child almost 20 years younger than you."

"Then what…" Miyagi said glaring at the woman. "Have you come here to rub it in my face that you have been able to move on and I can't?"

"No Miyagi…I came here to give you this. I thought you might want it back." She fished into her pocket book and she reached for her pocket book and grabbed something from inside it. She held out her hand and dropped something into Miyagi's. Opening his palm he found himself staring at the key he had given Shinobu to his apartment. It was attached to a small panda key chain something that he remembered winning in a claw game. It took him at least 20 times but it was worth it at the end to when he handed the little keychain to Shinobu and his face burst into a cheesy smile. Miyagi smiled to himself at the memory.

"Thank you Risako…I know how much you didn't like our relationship so you giving me this."

"Miyagi I didn't dislike your relationship. It was the fact that you both kept it a secret from all of us. When you came to our home drunk after Shinobu died hollering about how you exploited him and it was all your fault that he's gone well any one would get mad. But at the funeral I saw a side of you that I never thought I would see in you."

"What, miserable."

"No. actually giving a damn about someone other than yourself," She answered back folding her arms. Miyagi laughed lightly.

"Yeah well I guess I deserve that one." Risako's phone rang and she picked it up reading the text from its screen.

"Kota is waiting for me at the end of the park. It was good seeing you again." Risako looked up at Miyagi and gave him a kiss on the cheek. "I don't want you replace Shinobu in your heart but I hope you find someone that will help you mend it."

"I don't think that's possible…Shinobu." Risako placed a finger on his lips.

"He wouldn't want you to give up. You know that."

"Hai," And with that Risako walked away leaving Miyagi standing in the middle of the park. Miyagi turned around and was bumped into by a young man.

"Gomen," Miyagi instantly recognized the accent, it was American. The man had long brown hair tied back into a pony tail.

"_No it is fine it was my fault. I was not looking were I was going._" The man looked up in surprise.

"_You speak English?_"

"Language_ teacher_."

"_That's great. Can you help me I'm trying to find the water fountain in the center of the park? My friend told me it would be easy to find but…I seem to be having some trouble._" The man rubbed the back of his head.

"_Yes you just need to pass two more fire hydrants and then at the second one turn left. Just keep on walking and you'll eventually make it._"

"Arigatou gozaimasu." The man replied while bowing and ran off in a hurry.

Finding the water fountain the man spotted the person he was looking for. His friend was facing the other way texting on the phone. Quietly he hopped on top of the fountains edge and quietly walked to the other side. He placed his hands over the other mans eyes and sat down next to the jumping boy.

"Nani? Kaito?" Kaito removed his hands and smiled as he was glomped by the other man.

"Misaki calm down it's only been two months."

"I know but I missed you. What took you so long?"

"What took me so long? You gave me the worst directions ever. I ended up on the other side of the park and had to get directions. Luckily someone was finally nice enough to help a foreigner. Everyone else was too freaked out to talk to me once they saw I wasn't Japanese." Misaki laughed awkwardly.

"Sorry, I've never been very good with directions." The two men stood up and walked their way out of the park. "So how was the flight?"

"Ugg, the flight was so long. This is why I don't even visit America's main land that often." Misaki laughed causing Kaito to smile and rub Misaki's head and placed his hand over Misaki's shoulder. Misaki blushed slightly. "So umm…have you talked to umm?"

"Usami-sensei."

"Yeah Usami-sensei."

"Hai, it was a little weird at first but I think that we are ok." The two lovers walked down the road. Misaki wanted to show Kaito the shopping section of Tokyo. They grabbed ice cream and began looking through the windows. As Kaito stared into one of the windows Misaki felt the hair on the back of his neck go up. He turned around and looked across the street.

"Are you ok Misaki?"

"Yeah I'm fine. I just felt like…never mind." Misaki looked back and the two moved on. Across the street a man popped up from behind the garbage pail in an over coat and hat. He was then followed by another man in an equally suspicious outfit.

"Akihiko why the hell are we doing this." The second man yelled.

"Shhh, they will hear us." The author whispered. The accomplice tore his hat off revealing himself. Hiro did not like following one of his students around with his best friend.

"I'm going home." The teacher argued and began to walk away. His arm was grabbed and he was dragged the opposite direction.

"Akihiko let go."

"Iie I need your help with this. I have check out this Kaito guy so I know what I'm up against."

"Why would you need my help with that?"

"Because you have experience."(1) Hiro looked at his now going to be killed friend in horror.

"Sayonara," he shouted and tried to get away again. This time he was not stopped. He looked back and found Akihiko staring out at Misaki who had just dragged Kaito into an anime store. Hiro planted his face into his hands and sighed. "Ok come on."

The two men sat in front of a café waiting for the boys to come out of the store. Usagi had a newspaper in front of him and Hiro sat with his hat covering his face.

"So how did you know that Kaito was coming to Japan anyway?"

"I have an inside source." Hiro looked at Usagi in confusion. Then it dawned on him. "How did you get Takahiro to help you?" Hiro said glaring. Usagi just smirked and looked back at the store. He frowned and quickly brought the newspaper back up.

Misaki and Kaito had come out of the store and were walking across the street.

"Is this the new restaurant you're working at?"

"Hai…They make great hot chocolate. Sit here and I'll go grab us some." Kaito took a table next to the two men and sat down. Hiro looked over at Usagi and saw clenching the paper. Hiro sweat dropped and sighed. Ten minutes later Misaki came back out and sat down.

"Sorry I was just talking to my boss. He wanted to know if I could work next Saturday."

"Are you going too?" The two men heard Misaki say yes and then they heard rustling of bags. "Here's your manga. Sorry I can't read it. I never got the hang of kanji and Hiragana." Misaki laughed.

"It's ok I'll read it to you." Misaki took a sip of the hot chocolate. "Oishii." Kaito laughed.

"Hold on you have some on your face." With that the two men laughed as they got up and made their way out. Hiro looked over at his friend.

"Are we going to follow them?"

"No it's fine. I'm going to head home." Usagi said in a defeated voice. "You need to get back home to cook right? I know how much you want to make diner to surprise Nowaki after his first night back from work." Usagi got up and began walking. An empty Styrofoam cup was chucked at his head. "What was that for?" He yelled as he turned around. He backed up as he watched the seething teacher stomping up to him.

"You did not drag me to the other side of town to watch your ex go out with another guy for two freaking hours and then just give up." Hiro grabbed Usagi's collar and punched him sprawling him on the ground. People passing by rushed away some wondering if they should call a cop.

"Hiroki?" The author said in astonishment.

"But your right. I have to go cook…for my boyfriend. But let me just tell you I have watched you screw your life up over and over again and then get back up and make it right. I looked up to because of that, even if I didn't always agree with the way you do it. But you finally had something right in your life that I agree with and now you're just going to give up.

I don't know what happened and I don't really care. And from what you told me he gave you a hinted invitation to try and get him back. You complain so much and then not do anything about it but sneak around. Just make a move already." Hiro sighed and bent down to help Usagi up.

"Your right Hiroki, you always are."

"Yes I am. Man your worse than my students some times." The two of them laughed and made their way to Usagi's car two get home…and plot a plan that might actually work.

**Hiro's experience was when he stalked Nowaki**

**I know it's a little out of character. I have to get back into the groove. I've been gone to long. Gomen**

**Please Review kindly onegai. **


	8. Losing another one?

**Sorry for the delay but I had a really bad brain fart until I finally had a lick of inspiration last night.**

**Disclaimer: wish JR was mine but like most things it is not.**

~Middle of Tokyo~

Hiro was in a good mood. Today was Saturday which meant no classes, Nowaki had finally begun to pull himself out of his slump and was at another session with his therapist and Akihiko finally finished his plan to get Takahashi back and was at his Publishing agency handing in his finished novel. He finally finished a book after 3 years.

The teacher walked down the sidewalk with bags in his hands full of new books he bought. He got the best bargains and he wanted to get it home right away and start reading as fast as possible. He was so happy he was even thinking of doing something nice for his boyfriend…maybe even give him one of his perverted fantasies…yeah right. Hiro laughed out loud scaring some of the people next to him away.

Looking up he found himself in the food market, and thought while he was here he might as well grab something's for dinner. He paid for some carrots and potatoes and decided to start reading as he walked home. Why not he's done it before right? He pulled a book out and flipped to the first page his face melted into a happy expression. He didn't know that reading a book would be his greatest downfall.

~Dr. Watanabe~

Nowaki shook hands with Watanabe-sensei.

"So do you think you might be ready to start working again," Nowaki smiled softly.

"I think I'll call my boss and ask for another try,"

"Remember, just start off with one job and when you think you can handle it move on to another one," Nowaki nodded in agreement and was about to walk out when his cell phone rang. He cocked an eyebrow in confusion. The screen read hospital and a chill ran down his spin.

"Moshi Moshi," He answered. Watanabe sensei watched in disappointment as Nowaki's face went from concern to downright horror.

"Nowaki?" The doctor asked when Nowaki shut the phone, tears welling up in his eyes.

"He's in…he's in the hospital." Watanabe placed her hand on his shoulder.

"Who?"

"Hiro-san," Watanabe ran into her office and came back out with her jacket and keys.

"Sugimoto cancel all my appointments and hold my appointments," She said to her assistant. The woman behind the desk nodded and Watanabe guided her patient to her car.

~Marukawa Publishing Comp~

Misaki sighed as he stood in front of Marukawa publishing company. He promised Aikawa he would come visit her. As soon as he entered the office he was bombarded with the Usagi's publisher.

"Misaki!" The woman screamed in enjoyment as she tried to squeeze all the oxygen out of the boy.

"It's great to see you to but…" He was released and Aikawa gave him a warm smiled.

"You got bigger," She said cheerfully. Misaki smiled and rubbed the back of his head.

"Yeah just a little bit," Misaki looked beyond Aikawa and the publisher cocked her eyebrow.

"Are you looking for Usami-sensei?"

"Iie," Misaki said quickly but wasn't sly enough to trick the red head.

"Well that's good because he's not here. He ran out to go to the hospital about an hour ago," Misaki's eyes widen.

"Is he ok, what happened, what hospital," He cried shaking the older woman.

"Misaki calm down. His friend was hurt in an accident and he went to Tokyo central hospital," Misaki looked down in worry. "Why don't you go see him, he could probably use the comfort. I heard he was really close friends with this person,"

"I can't Aikawa-san. I can't be with him more than I have to…the more I'm with him the more I…"

"Fall back in love," Misaki blushed furiously. "You're in such denial Misaki-kun. If you have been away from Usami-sensei for this long and you feel this something for him, then I think there's still a chance,"

"But Kaito,"

"Forget about Kaito and forget about Usami," Misaki looked at Aikawa in confusion.

"But you just said,"

"You need to focus on yourself. Love is a funny thing, you love person one minute and you love someone else the next. You can't always put your feelings on the back burner to make everyone else happy. You need to decide who you want to be with," Misaki nodded with a determined look and ran out the building.

~Hospital~

Miyagi ran into the hospital and up to the desk where the nurse sat.

"I've been called in for the patient Kamijō Hiroki." The nurse type for a bit on the computer and then looked up.

"Are you a relative?"

"No but I was called here as one of his emergency contacts,"

"Well right now only spouses and blood relatives can visit, if you just have a seat in the waiting room I can see what is happening." Miyagi fisted his hands and walked over to the waiting room and sat down. Looking next to him he found a young woman with brown hair crying in her hands. Her hair was up in a messy bun and she wore a white blouse and a dark green skirt. Next to her was a shopping bag filled with a bunch of cabbages sticking out of it. Miyagi looked around to see if anyone could come and comfort her, he hated seeing anyone in distress. No one was around and sweat drops formed on his head as the sobbing got louder.

"Ano there, there," He said awkwardly trying to comfort her. The girl looked up at him with dusty blue eyes making Miyagi gasp. Her eyes where just like his…just like Shinobu's.

"It's my entire fault," Miyagi let her cry for a few more minutes until she finally calmed down. "Gomen nasai," She sniffed.

"Are you ok? You're not hurt anywhere are you?" The woman shook her head no. "Well I'm Miyagi Yō," He finished handing the girl a handkerchief.

"Tamura Shinju," She said dabbing her eyes. You have got to be kidding me her name has to sound like Shinobu's name too. The gods must be punishing him for something. Before he could say anything further Nowaki came running in and almost slid into the counter. Miyagi jumped up and ran to Nowaki who looked like he was about to strangle the nurse for not letting him see Hiro.

"But I'm a doctor,"

"It doesn't matter sir only…" the nurse said back before getting cut off by Miyagi grabbing Nowaki by the shirt and dragging him away. Just as soon as he sat Nowaki down Usagi came running in causing Miyagi to roll his eyes and chase after the famous writer.

The men waited for in silence before the doctor finally came out.

"Are you here for Kamijō Hiroki?" The men stood up quickly including the woman that Miyagi was trying to cheer up. Miyagi looked at her and seemed to be the only one to notice her standing. "Kamijō-san suffered a concussion, a broken leg and some bumps and bruises but he's not in any serious danger. One of you can come visit for now," The three looked at each other but they all knew who was going. Miyagi pushed Nowaki towards the doctor.

"Tell him to get better soon for us ok," Usagi said to Hiro's boyfriend. Nowaki nodded and walked away with the doctor. Usagi turned around and watched as Misaki ran into the room. "Misaki?" Usagi called and walked over to his panting ex-boyfriend. Misaki grabbed Usagi by the hand and dragged him out of the hospital.

"I broke up with him," Misaki said. Usagi looked at him in confusion as tears began to well up in the younger man's eyes.

"You broke up with Kaito?" Usagi asked and Misaki nodded.

"I went to his place and broke it off (sniff) I can't get you out of my head (sniff) I never could," Tears where pouring down his cheeks now and Usagi placed his fingers on Misaki's face and wiped it away.

"I've missed you," Usagi said bringing his head down and gently placing his lips onto Misaki's. The younger man grabbed a hold of the author and deepened it. When they broke apart they were both panting.

"I am so sorry for leaving."

"And I am sorry for what I said. I never meant to say that I didn't trust you. I trust you with my life."

"Yeah considering I saved it a few time." The two laughed and Misaki sniffled one last time. "So how's your friend," Usagi smiled.

"The doctors said he would be ok his worse injury was a concussion."

At the same time the couple was making up Miyagi sat back down with the woman in the waiting room.

"You know Hiroki?" Miyagi asked the woman. Shinju burst into tears once again.

"It's my fault your friend is in the hospital. I just reached for an apple and the entire stand fell. He slipped on one of the fruits and fell really hard and all the books he was holding fell on top of him." She sobbed. "I'm so sorry," Miyagi just stared at her and began laughing. She looked up at the professor and then in anger she hit him on the shoulder.

"Ow what was that for."

"Don't make fun of me,"

"I wasn't making fun of you. I was making fun of my friend, only he could do that," and he continued laughing. And soon the two began talking.

A half an hour later Miyagi was allowed up with Usagi. Misaki opted to stay in the waiting room after hearing that the patient was his devil teacher. They knocked in the door and found Hiro watching T.V with a bandage around his head and a cast on his leg. Nowaki had fallen asleep with his head resting on Hiro's lap, the teacher's fingers threading through his boyfriends hair.

"Hey bookworm how was your trip," Usagi greeted as the two walked in.

"Yeah did you have a nice fall," Miyagi laughed. Hiro turned bright red.

"Shut up," He hissed trying to let Nowaki sleep.

"Oh and someone wants to apologize," Miyagi said and went outside brining in Shinju. The girl bowed as far as she could go and apologized over and over again. Miyagi had to finally push her out as Hiro smiled slyly.

"You like her," Miyagi froze.

"No,"

"Why not give it a shot…I bet she could use the company." Miyagi was about to protest but remembered how Risako said he should start seeing people. He reached into his pocket and held the key that he gave Shinobu.

"But…" Usagi put his hand on his shoulder.

"The kid would have wanted you to be happy," Usagi said. Miyagi smiled.

"You think,"

"Yes now get out of here already," Hiro said. Miyagi smiled and slicked back his hair while walking out "Oh and by the way, she came with me in the ambulance and in between her sobbing she told me that she's a senior…in high school." Hiro finished with a smile leaving Miyagi to sulk at the age difference as he left the room.

Usagi took the chair next to Hiro's bed.

"I got back together with Misaki," Hiro's eyes widen.

"You mean the plan actually work. I thought that would fail," Usagi glared at his friend.

"I didn't need the plan…He came here and we both apologized. So we decided to start over."

"Good for you," Usagi smiled.

"Well I got to go. I'm taking Misaki out for a drink." And Usagi left the room. Nowaki groaned in his sleep and moved himself a little closer to Hiro's body. Hiro smiled and started flipping through the channels again. He wasn't supposed to fall asleep do to his concussion. He rubbed his fingers through Nowaki's hair again and waited for him to wake up from a good sleep he hadn't had in a really long time.

**Whew. One more chapter to go and I'll be finished. Hope you liked it.**

**Review kindly onegai. **


	9. This is what life's like

**Ok so last chapter of my fan fiction. It took me forever because I wanted to get it perfect. I still wish it came out better but I guess no writer is satisfied with their work. It also might be awhile before I write another JR fic since I'm all out of inspiration. Just have to wait until new chapters are out.**

**Thank you to all my readers and reviewers. You're the best for sticking with me.**

**Disclaimer: Shungiku Nakamura of course.**

~A few days after the hospital incident~

Misaki walked up to Kaito who was hailing a cab in front of his hotel.

"You're…you're not going to get a cab like that. Do you want me to help?" Kaito looked at his ex in surprised and then with a slight smile nodded. Misaki smiled back and took a step out into the streets and waved his arm up and down frantically.

"I don't think that's going to work…any…better?" He finished when a taxi cab rode up to the younger man. Kaito laughed slightly and picked up his suitcase. "After you," He said and opened the door for Misaki.

After the car ride to the air port the stood there silently waiting for the flight to Hawaii. Misaki watched Kaito bite into a candy bar and chew it slowly. The older man saw Misaki watching him and looked back at him in confusion.

"What?" He asked.

"I did something awful to you. I expected cursing, and yelling, and anger. But you're always so nice to me," Misaki said almost breaking into tears. Kaito sighed and placed his hand on Misaki's shoulder.

"Yeah I'm upset Misaki I'm not going to lie. It will probably take me a while to get over you too. But ever since we started going out I knew that even though you loved me, I could always tell you were thinking about him." Kaito said sadly.

"Flight 32 to United States, Honolulu International, Hawaii is now boarding at gate 6. All passengers please make their way to the gate,"

Kaito took his arm off of Misaki's shoulder and picked up his bag.

"Good bye Misaki. You better come down and visit all of us," Kaito said. Misaki sniffed and was surprised as Kaito grabbed him for a hug and then bent down to kiss him lightly on the forehead. Misaki watched his ex boyfriend walk down the hall way and hand his ticket and passport to the flight attendant. With one last wave goodbye Kaito left.

*Usagi's apartment*

Misaki closed the door to Usagi's apartment and leaned against the door. The author came out of his office and walked down the stairs.

"Misaki are you ok?" The author asked and Misaki looked up to him.

"Hai…and thanks for letting me see Kaito before he left,"

"Well I trust you. I know that you'll come back to me right," Misaki looked up at the author in surprise as the older man walked up to him.

"You…you trust me?" Misaki asked and Usagi gave him a gentle smile.

"Of course, and now I need to fill up on all the Misaki that I have been missing for all those years," Usagi said lifted the younger lover bridal style and tore up the stairs. Misaki struggled from his grip but couldn't get out.

"Iie. I knew there was a reason I left. I can't….believe we have to go through this again…I completely forgot about this!" He yelled while trying to resist the perverted author from moving his hands down his shirt.

~Hiro's and Nowaki's apartment~

Hiro sat on the couch with his casted leg propped up on the coffee table. He bent over and tried to wiggle his finger into the top of the cast and reach the dame itch he had on his leg. Nowaki came in to the den with two mugs filled with tea. Smiling he handed one to Hiro and Nowaki took a seat next to him.

"Aren't you supposed to be going to work?" Hiro grumbled. Nowaki looked over at Hiro and smiled as he watched the teacher's foot squirm under the plaster.

"Hai but…" Nowaki stated putting his mug down and got up and walk down the hall. He came back a few seconds later and came in with a blow dryer. Plugging it into the wall he walked back to the couch and sat back down. "I told them that I need to take care of someone I love very much,"

Hiro's eyes widen in surprised when Nowaki leaned over and gently lifted Hiro's cast until it was resting on his lap. He set the blow dryer on cool and turned it on.

"What are you doing?"Hiro asked skeptically trying to move his injured leg away.

"Tsumori-sensei told me that if you blow dry your itch on cold then it helps it go away," Nowaki smiled blow drying inside the cast. The sat there in silence with nothing but the sound of the blow dryer. Hiro looked down at the cast and then realization struck him.

"You told work someone you loved?" He asked. Nowaki turned off the blow dryer and set it down on the table. He looked back at Hiro guilt clearly on his face.

"Yeah…Hiro-san I have been awful this past year and I feel like have been the absolute worst boyfriend ever,"

"Well you got that right," Hiro pouted and Nowaki looked down with a sad smile.

"I deserved that, and I would understand if you want me gone," Nowaki was smacked on the head with one of the couch pillows. "What was that for Hiro-san?" Nowaki yelled and was surprised to find himself being pulled in for a kiss.

"Itai," Hiro hissed from his bruised arms and back.

"Hiro-san?" Nowaki asked after being let go.

"I was kidding you baka," Hiro said and took a sip of his tea trying to hide the fact he was blushing. Nowaki smiled softy in understanding.

"Thank you Hiro-san,"

~Middle of Tokyo~

Miyagi stood outside a small café and looked down at his watch.

"Miyagi!" The teacher heard from behind him and turned around and watched as Shinju the high school girl ran over to him. She bends over and panted trying to catch her breath. "Sorry I'm late I had classroom duty," She said pulling herself together.

"It's alright," He said and opened the door to the small café. After being brought to a table and ordering food Miyagi sat back slightly. He watched Shinju take sips of her soda through a straw and look around the café in thought. She looked so much like Shinobu like she could be his twin. Shinju felt Miyagi's eyes on her and stopped slurping her coke.

"Gomen," She laughed shyly. "I'm a little thirsty,"

"I can tell," He smiled taking out a cigarette and placing it in his mouth lighting it up and taking a deep breath. "So what did you need?" He asked.

"Oh yeah," She said and pulled out a book from her school bag. "I have an English test tomorrow and foreign language is definitely not my forte. Can you help me study?" She asked flipping through the textbook. Miyagi placed his chin in the palm of his hand and gave the young girl a glare. When she looked back up she looked behind her and then back at the teacher. "Are you glaring at me?" She asked.

"I happen to know that you're very good at English. I heard you taking to your overseas friend from Canada remember," A sweat drop made its way down her face as she smiled awkwardly.

"I've been found out," She said closing her text book slowly.

"So what did you really want," He said taking another puff of smoke.

"I wanted to be with you," She said.

"You could have just said that," He said back cocking an eyebrow.

"No I mean I want to _be_ with you…I want to be your girlfriend," She said building up her courage. Miyagi choked on his cigarette and began coughing. "Oh Kami, I am so sorry," She cried.

"Why would you want to go out with me? I'm old enough to be your father," he said with his eyes wide opened.

"I don't know," She answered back looking down at her hands that were placed in her lap. "It's just for the past couple of weeks I've had no one but you in my head," She stood up and walked over to the teacher and bent down placing her hands on his shoulders and placing her lips on his with full force. Her brown hair slid down her shoulder tickling Miyagi's neck. His eyes widen in surprise and pushed her away.

"I…I'm so sorry," Shinju said grabbing her bag and running out of the café. Miyagi grabbed his wallet threw enough money to cover the lunch and ran after the girl. He finally caught up to her along the river and grabbed her pulling her back. She wouldn't look up at him as she stared at her feet.

"Look," He stated rubbing the back of his neck and looking at the sky. "I didn't mean to do that. It's just too soon,"

Shinju looked at him in confusion sniffing back tears.

"What do you mean?" She asked.

"I had a lover who died in the M university incident," Shinju's eyes widen knowing about the accident he was talking about. Everyone in Tokyo knew about the accident.

"I'm so sorry. Was she a teacher like you?"

Miyagi laughed.

"No. I know it might seem kind of weird but she was a…he…and he was a student like you,"

"He?"

"Yeah. I know right. I've been with women all my life but I remember the day he came barging into my life,"

He waited for the sounds of her discuss for him being with a man but he found her walking up to him and reached up on her tip toes and placed a light kiss on his cheek.

"Then I'll wait, and when you're ready I would like to meet him," She said and began her walk home leaving Miyagi standing there in shock.

~a year later~

Usagi drove his red sports car into the parking lot and he and Misaki stepped out of the car meeting all silence except for the deafening sound of a shrine bell slowly swinging back and forth. A chill worked its way up Misaki's spine as they made their way to the entrance of Tokyo's cemetery. Misaki hadn't been to a gravesite since his parent's accident and being there now was not a feeling he wanted. He jumped slightly as Usagi placed his hand on his shoulder and Misaki eased into the authors embrace. Looking up the older man smiled slightly causing Misaki to blush madly and walk on through the graveyard. They walked until they found the Sakura tree with his pink and white petals falling gently to the ground. They spotted Hiro and Nowaki standing under the tree waving the couple over. Misaki waved back and ran up to them with Usagi walking closely behind him.

"Hey," Usagi said and bowed slightly in greeting.

"Konichiwa," Nowaki said back bowing with a slight nod. The four men walked over the grave where Shinobu was buried and Hiro pulled out a big blanket out of the picnic basket that was resting on his arm. Spreading it out everyone pulled out the food and drinks they brought. Hiro grumbled as he looked at his watch.

"Late as usual," He said in annoyance and then shouted as arms found their way around his waist.

"Aw don't be mad hunny bunny," He heard from behind himself. Turning around he found Miyagi and his girlfriend Shinju in a light brown skirt and a light pink blouse.

"Baka!" He shouted his face going red with both anger and embarrassment. Taking a seat everyone said there hello's and began making their own sandwiches. Before making his own Miyagi made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with three slices of lettuce and placed it in front of Shinobu's grave with a small bottle of sake.

When Miyagi turned around Shinju was smiling at him sadly and placed her hand on his cheek and wiped a tear from his face.

"Are you ok?" She whispered making sure the other didn't notice the older man's tears as they hungrily dug into their food. Miyagi smiled to her and leaned in for a slight kiss. Pulling back Shinju was blushing slightly and took a sip from her can of soda as Miyagi laughed quietly.

After lunch group began to pack up everything. Handing a bag to Usagi, Misaki's phone rang.

"Moshi, moshi," Misaki answered. "Oh Sumi-sempai how are you?" Usagi glared at the boy and then looked over at Hiro who was shaking his head no. Nowaki stood next to Hiro and handed him the blanket.

"I don't know hold on," Misaki said. "Usagi Sumo-sempai and some old friends want to go out for Karaoke and drinks. Is that ok?" He asked already ready to fight back.

"Of course Misaki,"

"Usagi why don't you ever…wait…what?" He said.

"I said go you can go. You're old enough to make your own decisions. I'll drive you over if you want," Misaki stood there in surprised and held his phone back up to his ear.

"Sorry sempai I just realized that I can't go out tonight…Ok you too…ja nai," He said and hung up.

"I said you can go," Usagi said in confusion.

"I know but I rather go home," Misaki finished and took a hold of Usagi's hand. Miyagi and Shinju walk with each other side by side followed by Hiro and Nowaki the younger man putting his arm around the smaller teacher. As they walked out of the cemetery Hiro turned his head back to the tome stone and smiled. It might not be the best life and it was far from over or perfect but this is what their lives were like and they were going to have to live with it.

**Ah yay finished. It took forever to finish it but I wanted it to be a good ending. For anyone who likes my work I have 2 other Junjou Romantica stories out and complete. I also have a Beyblade story out (Kai x Tyson) and a Legal Drug which I'm really proud of. It's only 3 volumes since CLAMP never finished it so if you want a quick read, read that and then my Fic. Also I'm going to work on a Gundam Seed fic (Athren x Kira of course). So I hope you stay with me xD. **

**Thank you and Review kindly onegai. **


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